27 Comments

Having grief support outside of family and friends became even more important and needed in the second year. So glad you feel supported and held. Wishing you ease and peace on your journey ❤️

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Thank you Janine.

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Elizabeth, thank you for this. My son died three years ago and I'll miss him forever. Sending you love. Beautiful way to honour Henry.

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Tiffany, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for reaching out.

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These tender days are filled with depths of feelings and always I awaken to the day ‘after’ with a huge exhale. I too was gifted that book by a friend of a friend who had lost her son. She was the first person I called when I emerged from my cocoon to witness how she was ‘doing it?’ Moving forward and living a life that fully included her son. We drank coffee, ate baked sweets and I will forever be grateful for her loving care of my shattered heart. All the things you long for to experience with Henry. Me Too, I get that. My son, Douglas, shed his earth suit sixteen years ago. I’m not at all sure how my heart kept beating when his ceased? Knowing we don’t have to journey alone and that there are anchor places to tether ourselves to has been a lifeline for me. Sending a heartfelt hug from Hawaii to you, Henry’s forever mom. You honor him so beautifully with your transparency and depth of care. Thank you. 💜

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Your words are beautiful. Sending you much love. Love cc

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thank you for this; i deeply love the poem, and im hugging you from brooklyn 🩷

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Thank you Nico!

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Joanie - Thank you for your note and your support. I'm so sorry that your son Douglas no longer walks the earth. It is tricky, figuring out how to live with such an enormous loss. Sending love to you and your family.

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I love that you were inspired by Gabrielle Calvocoressi. I read one of her poems shortly after Kiki died and that poem is what got me writing. It touched me so deeply and inspired me, I still think about it often. I love how you used that to write your own poem about Henry.

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I am so sorry for your loss. Sending lots of love.

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Elizabeth, I am so sorry for your loss. The love you have (present tense) for your son shines through so brightly in your writing. I lost my Dad 5 years ago and really resonate with your experience. Your poem in particular is incredibly touching. Thank you for sharing your story and giving words to this side of grief ❤️

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Thank you for reading and sharing Ruhie. I'm so sorry for the loss of your father.

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Thank you for sharing your beautiful memories and photo of Henry as well as the book.

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Thank you Tracy💕

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Elizabeth- your writing is amazing, so pure and honest. I know it is another hard milestone this week. Thank you for being so open and sharing with us all. Beautiful beautiful.

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Thank you Sue 🩷

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Elizabeth thank you for sharing this. I should not have read it from my desk in the office as now people are seeing me cry. But who cares about that. It’s so relatable to me since I just dropped off my middle kid at school. Even though he is on the same island I am on (Manhattan) I still worry and check his location too frequently. All of this flooded into me about college and our first few weeks. Years ago (34) but feels like yesterday.

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Larry - Thank you so much for your kind note. I'm sorry you were crying in the office. 🩷 Most of the time, everyone stays safe and happy in college. There is much more schools could be doing to ensure safe campuses - more on that later...

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Another touching and relatable article. Thank you for sharing and I miss Henry too - as mothers, we grieve for all sons and daughters who have left us too soon. We grieve for all our children meant to us, our families and the world who would have benefitted from their gifts. I am at a full year now of losing Jon with 8/21 marking the day. I think ahead to year two without my beautiful forever 19 year old son and wonder how I will feel. He would have been starting his junior year in college this year. I am at the point where I see other posts of families who get that opportunity of taking their kids to college and moving them into dorms or apartments - and all the photos! I wonder if they know how truly lucky they are or do they take this for granted? I wonder if they give those precious moments their full attention and savor those experiences or are they just busy recording it for social media? I think many post content and forget the real gift is truly being present in that moment — which to the dismay of Zuckerberg doesn’t need to be recorded on social media as much as it needs to be recorded in our hearts and memories. What means the most to me now is not just a photo but remembering the happiness or emotions I felt in my heart as I recall a particular memory. I wish I had been more present myself in all those years past and now I know! Thanks again Elizabeth for your touching words.

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Linda - That is so poignant and true. It's wonderful that you are soaking up these moments and everything about it: the smells, the sounds, etc. It's a great reminder for all of us to do this. I'm so sorry Jon isn't with us. 🩷

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Elizabeth, Thanks for sharing Henry with us. And how you cope with this unbearable grief. And love seeing that picture of Henry!

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Thank you Dianne 🩷

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Oh that poem, Elizabeth. Thank you for sharing your grief and inviting us to honor this tragic anniversary with you. And sorry about the bathroom. Sending hugs.

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Thanks so much, Stacy. 🩷

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Your poem brought tears to my eyes. Sending you and your family big hugs. Henry's memory is definitely a blessing to all who knew him.

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Thanks for your note Corinne. 🩷

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